i hate being in such despair tonight and not knowing why. "what the heck is my problem!", is what i keep thinking. and then i just start tearing up again.
i think i just need sleep. i'm sure that's the answer to my problem--whatever it is.

sorry to john maxwell who kept asking me if i was okay, and i just kept saying, "yeah, i'm fine. i'm just tired."
i felt like saying, "sorry, i know i look like hell, but i really don't know what my problem is...i just want to cry on somebody's shoulder."

i'm not just sleep deprived. there are other things.

it's like i just keep thinking of people's problems, and their hurts, and my heart just cries out in grief.

i need to go to sleep.